b) Basic Assumptions

When you prepare for a private conference with a staff member to discuss some behavior or activity that needs to change, you first have clear in your mind the purposes for the conference--what you want to achieve. Then you need to confirm in your mind the basic assumptions that will guide your thinking during the conference.

Here are some assumptions that will serve you well when you work with staff:

1. People want to do well.
2. They want to be recognized for their good work.
3. They usually know when they are doing something inappropriate or negative.
4. When they understand that their supervisor will confront inappropriate behaviors, most people will change those behaviors.
5. The behaviors in question are separate from the total person; good people sometimes behave badly.
6. People don't feel good about behaving badly.
7. Given the opportunity, people can figure out what's going wrong and fix it.
8. Most times, an open, reflective, and non-judgmental conversation with the supervisor can help the person change the behavior.

If you approach a disciplinary conference with the purposes posted yesterday and the assumptions listed here, you will not be inclined to accuse, to judge, to expect the worst from this person, or to issue ultimatums. And you will maximize the chances for a positive outcome.